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Why I’m a Stay-at-Home Mom: The Short Story

November 14, 2011

John- 3 yrs.

From last week’s blog post You Write the Title, I Write the Post, I decided to tackle Grace Graieg’s title: Why I’m a Stay-at-Home Mom. Thank you for the great topic/title Grace and for everyone who participated!

My desire to be a stay-at-home mom (SAHM) came from an early age. My mom was a SAHM to my sister and I for as long as I can remember. She made our lunches every night for school the next day and she was always available if we were sick and needed to come home. She drove me to school and picked me up. When I started riding the bus, she had a snack ready for me when I came home and drove me to swim practice. When I got my license, well, nothing really changed except that I drove myself everywhere!

The impact my mom’s presence in our home had on me from an early age was significant. It was not only her physical presence but her emotional and spiritual one too. Her genuine interest in my day, her prayers, and sweet conversation assured me that I was loved and cared for. And I never doubted her love. She also made a significant impact outside the home among our neighbors and friends. She was always baking something to bring to someone and I remember her sharing the gospel regularly.

John- 3 Rebekah- 1

So I guess you could say I always assumed I would wear the same shoes as my Mom. I wanted to make a difference like she had in my life.

After Jeremiah and I found out we were expecting our first child, we decided that after our son was born that we would trade roles and I would work part-time while he took care of John. You can read about my experience transitioning out of my career and into the home in this article I wrote for Ungrind.

Once our second child was on the way, I knew that it was time for me to be full-time at home. From the books I read in my child psychology classes in college, I knew that the formative years (birth- 5 years) were critical to a child’s development and growth and if the proper nurturing, discipline, and love were absent in those years, it could have a far-reaching effect in the future.

Other friends and moms who were further along in the journey than I was encouraged me to be fully engaged in the home as well. I knew in my heart that’s what I wanted so Jeremiah and I made the necessary changes. In August 2010 a few months before my daughter’s birth, I dove right in!

Now about a year and a half into it, I’ve learned that being a SAHM isn’t particularly glorious. In fact, most days it’s not. And I struggle many days with my anger and impatience. My kids can be demanding, needy, whiny, fussy, difficult, and more. Dirty diapers are yucky, having to schedule your world around naps can be annoying, and sometimes you just wonder if the sacrifice is worth it and if you’re really making a difference in this little one’s life.

But regardless of how hard it is raising my kids on a day in and day out basis, I still believe the sacrifice is worth it. And I believe the hard work of being fully present in our home will pay dividends in their life on down the road.

Of course, this is my prayer.

Before I know it, my oldest, John, will be in school and I know I will miss him greatly and will look forward to seeing his handsome smile when he comes home. These formative years will fly by, and I want to be the first one to see all the milestones my children cross. And I believe it’s my role and responsibility to do so.

I want to be the one to give them all my love. I want to build into their self-esteem and teach them how to respect and love all people. By God’s grace and with his help, I want to teach them right from wrong and discipline when it’s needed. I don’t want to look back with any regrets in that I “should” have been there but other commitments took precedence over them. I want to be all there for my children and for them to never doubt my commitment to raising them.

Of course, this all can only be done by God’s grace.

Everyone has their own story and convictions when it comes to being in the home. For me personally, the only way for me to be fully present and to be the best Mom I can be is to be right where my #1 mission field exists.

And of course, this doesn’t mean that I don’t regularly schedule girl night outs, date nights with my husband, babysitters, weekend getaways, time to write, to be resourceful and make money, and time to have fun. All the more, I make time for “me” (and sanity) because I need it badly!

Well I just heard a cry. My time to write is up. Until next time…

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5 Comments leave one →
  1. November 14, 2011 5:38 pm

    very nice and well put! I admire you!

  2. November 14, 2011 6:16 pm

    thanks so much & thank you for reading.

  3. November 15, 2011 8:34 am

    Love this post. Makes me feel better to hear someone else say “it’s hard work!” but worth it. Your kids are beautiful…..your whole family is! So glad you have found a balance in writing that works for you. I struggle with this. I love to write but find that when I sit down at the computer I’m not disciplined to get back up when I need to. I read other people’s blogs and then tweak my own post and then it just keeps on going. Sigh. I’ve always been an all or nothing sort of person and I strive for moderation but fail often in this area.

    • November 16, 2011 9:10 pm

      Yes, I feel like every day is hard work 🙂 And today happened to be one of my hardest. *sigh.*

      I too struggle with the balance in writing. My priorities are God, husband, children, home, writing… but these get out of order and I always have to remember what comes first.

      I would love to do more when it comes to writing, but right now, I’m just not in that season. I know what you mean about getting caught up on other blogs and before you know it, time is gone! Moderation is a struggle for me too. Thanks for sharing Melody!

  4. grace graieg permalink
    November 17, 2011 10:21 pm

    thank you for choosing my title samantha. i already know it, but i’m so thankful for constant reminders that investing in the home – where the husband and children are, is where God really wants a mom to be. i appreciate you sharing about the difficulties and unglamorous side of it, God will honour moms for it, i’m sure. 🙂 you remind me of proverbs 31. (love the pictures, by the way!).

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