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Why I’ll never be a member of

September 28, 2009

976672929_4d8cac191cA few weeks ago, my husband was driving down the road and saw a truck advertising The slogan “Life is Short. Have an Affair” was written across it in big letters. They were  taking a tour through several cities to market what they have to offer. Their site boasts over 4.5 million members.

Noel Biderman, President and CEO of states, “I don’t think a billboard is going to convince you to commit adultery. It just makes you aware of our service. People come to us because we offer them a lack of judgment. Step back and look at marriage and divorce rates. Monogamy is obviously up for debate.”

My heart breaks that monogamy is up for debate. My heart breaks that there is a lie out there that says you’ll be happy if you just… have an affair.

I’m also reminded by the fact that I am by no means immune to an affair. No one is- No matter how wonderful your marriage is. The lie is out there and wants to choke the life and joy out of every marriage.

We all know the alarming divorce stats and have been impacted and devastated by divorce either directly or indirectly. We can’t hide under the sheets and pretend that divorce is “no big deal.”  I’d like to proclaim first of all that marriage is worth fighting for.

It is worth fighting for because God’s will is for marriage alone and not for adultery. In Exodus 24, God established a decree and said, “You shall not commit adultery.” This law was established out of love and protection- not to put binding shackles on our feet or to keep us from fun.

Paul writes in 1 Corinthians: “The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. The wife’s body does not belong to her alone but also to her husband. In the same way, the husband’s body does not belong to him alone but also to his wife.”

God has designed marriage so that my body doesn’t belong to me but to my husband. Therefore, the “owner” of my body is my husband and God.

There is a dark, subtle lie that is capturing the hearts of 4.5 million people and it might be capturing yours or already has- I don’t know. But God always offers forgiveness and is deeply concerned with the matters of your heart. He is always in the business of restoring what has been lost.

It’s no doubt that life is short… but it is not found in having an affair to satisfy a deeper need.

Have you seen the billboards and TV slots? What do you think?

6 Comments leave one →
  1. Kristen permalink
    September 28, 2009 7:34 pm

    Check out the nightline debate with biederman, Ed young and 2 other folks. I agree….sad, worth fighting for, all susceptible, and glad to serve a God that cares about us, marriage, purity and forgives us!

  2. Anna permalink
    September 28, 2009 7:34 pm

    That’s profoundly disturbing. Monogamy is NOT up for debate in my marriage!

  3. Ashley permalink
    September 28, 2009 7:35 pm

    Couldn’t agree more with you Samantha! It is really sad that people actually use this site.

  4. Liz permalink
    September 6, 2010 4:50 pm

    I have been on that site and I did have an affair for about 9 months. Its is sad that there are so many unhappy couples out there not just men , women to that are looking for SOMETHING. I never said it was right and it end badly.. But the site is out there for a reason. And I think if we all looked long and hard and honestly everyone would relize they are steps away too….

    I am still with my husband, but even unhappier than I was before…

  5. September 7, 2010 6:58 am

    Thank you for your comment Liz. I agree completely with you. Thanks so much for your honesty.

  6. Brie Hues permalink
    June 13, 2014 8:44 pm

    Marriage is not certificate that assures your husband has to put up with lenghty periods of no sex. A wife that treats him like one of the children. A wife who let herself go a long time ago. If this is you, YOU are the betrayer of the marriage.

    Remember honor and obey? Submitting to your husband?

    Who wants to saddle up to a depressed, over weight, shrew?

    Don’t treat people right and provide the nurture and acceptance men must have – he will cheat. And, believe there are plenty of beautiful women out there that will be only to happy to pick him up, brush him off, and give him a whole new perspective on life.

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