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told to be… still

September 16, 2010

I come from a line of “doers” so when the nurse told me today that I need to stay off my feet, I thought it would be impossible- especially with a toddler.

For the past few days, I’ve had really strong and firm braxton hicks contractions when I stand up, walk, do chores, anything. They only subside when I sit or lie down. It’s crazy because right at the moment I stand up, my abdomen is as hard as a rock. I have six weeks left until baby girl Krieger’s due date and so far my husband and doula have a suspicion she could come early October.

Yesterday, I sat down for an hour while Jeremiah played with John and it was really, really hard. But I think I’m learning a lesson already.

I’m not still enough and I don’t listen to God nearly enough.

While sitting in our lazy boy with my chubby toes propped up, I was able to reflect more on life and what was really going on. Life can get so fuzzy when you’re so busy. I’m having a baby and my sweet little boy is nearing two. I have an incredible husband and God is building our little family the way He desires. What a gift. It was as if God whispered in my ear that everything was going to be fine and that He was in control. I didn’t need to worry about the logistics of the baby’s arrival, our time table, the lack of sleep coming up with a newborn, or anything. God was handling it. And He would handle it.

I sensed such peace covering my anxious heart.

God is absolutely sovereign. Yes, I will make plans as best I can, but he directs my steps. He knew that I would get to the point in my pregnancy that I would just have to get off my feet.

Who knows if our baby girl will come early, right on time, or late. I’d love to know. But right now what I need the most in my life is to be still and know that He is God, and I am not.

Do you find it hard to be still?

4 Comments leave one →
  1. Anna permalink
    September 16, 2010 9:12 am

    I’ve definitely found it harder to be still as a Mom! But even being ‘still’ before didn’t always translate to focusing on God. I’m working through a new study by Anne Graham Lotz… you might check her out if you need some reading material. Though I’m sure you’re familiar with her!

    Praying your little girl will wait a few more weeks! (I went into labor the day after I was determined full term at 37 wks. Adam was born at 37 weeks and 2 days!)

    • September 16, 2010 11:21 am

      thanks Anna. Wow- I didn’t know you were that early with Adam. It does happen! By the way, I love Anne Graham Lotz’ books 🙂

  2. September 16, 2010 9:53 am

    Oh yes, indeed! It shows how much I’m self-sufficient! I think only I can get things done, and if they don’t, I’m discontent. It’s hard to be content in the stillness of non-doing for me. God’s grown me a lot in this area, but I still have so much to learn! Hope your little one stays put just a bit longer! 🙂

    • September 16, 2010 1:32 pm

      “It’s hard to be content in the stillness of non-doing..” that’s me exactly. That’s neat to hear he’s growing you in that area. I definitely have a ways to go there too 🙂 thanks Danielle.

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